You hit me with a cricket bat. It’s a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool. No… It’s a thing; it’s like a plan, but with more greatness. I am the Doctor, and you are the Daleks!

They’re not aliens, they’re Earth…liens! *Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do! I’m the Doctor. Well, they call me the Doctor. I don’t know why. I call me the Doctor too. I still don’t know why.

Did I mention we have comfy chairs? Aw, you’re all Mr. Grumpy Face today. You know how I sometimes have really brilliant ideas? You hate me; you want to kill me! Well, go on! Kill me! KILL ME!

I am the last of my species, and I know how that weighs on the heart so don’t lie to me! *Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do! I hate yogurt. It’s just stuff with bits in.

You know when grown-ups tell you ‘everything’s going to be fine’ and you think they’re probably lying to make you feel better? I am the Doctor, and you are the Daleks! I’m nobody’s taxi service; I’m not gonna be there to catch you every time you feel like jumping out of a spaceship.

Saving the world with meals on wheels. *Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do! You know how I sometimes have really brilliant ideas? No… It’s a thing; it’s like a plan, but with more greatness.

You hit me with a cricket bat. No, I’ll fix it. I’m good at fixing rot. Call me the Rotmeister. No, I’m the Doctor. Don’t call me the Rotmeister. I am the last of my species, and I know how that weighs on the heart so don’t lie to me!

All I’ve got to do is pass as an ordinary human being. Simple. What could possibly go wrong? You know when grown-ups tell you ‘everything’s going to be fine’ and you think they’re probably lying to make you feel better?

Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or as I’ve always known him: Jeff. I am the Doctor, and you are the Daleks! I am the Doctor, and you are the Daleks! You know when grown-ups tell you ‘everything’s going to be fine’ and you think they’re probably lying to make you feel better?

I’m nobody’s taxi service; I’m not gonna be there to catch you every time you feel like jumping out of a spaceship. Sorry, checking all the water in this area; there’s an escaped fish. You’ve swallowed a planet!

Stop talking, brain thinking. Hush. No… It’s a thing; it’s like a plan, but with more greatness. Aw, you’re all Mr. Grumpy Face today. They’re not aliens, they’re Earth…liens! It’s a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool.

I’m the Doctor, I’m worse than everyone’s aunt. *catches himself* And that is not how I’m introducing myself. They’re not aliens, they’re Earth…liens! Annihilate? No. No violence. I won’t stand for it. Not now, not ever, do you understand me?! I’m the Doctor, the Oncoming Storm – and you basically meant beat them in a football match, didn’t you?

Heh-haa! Super squeaky bum time! I’m the Doctor, I’m worse than everyone’s aunt. *catches himself* And that is not how I’m introducing myself. *Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do!

*Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do! I hate yogurt. It’s just stuff with bits in. It’s art! A statement on modern society, ‘Oh Ain’t Modern Society Awful?’!

Saving the world with meals on wheels. *Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do! No, I’ll fix it. I’m good at fixing rot. Call me the Rotmeister. No, I’m the Doctor. Don’t call me the Rotmeister.

The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things.…hey.…the good things don’t always soften the bad things; but vice-versa the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant. I am the Doctor, and you are the Daleks!

I’m nobody’s taxi service; I’m not gonna be there to catch you every time you feel like jumping out of a spaceship. *Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do!

They’re not aliens, they’re Earth…liens! Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or as I’ve always known him: Jeff. I hate yogurt. It’s just stuff with bits in. You know when grown-ups tell you ‘everything’s going to be fine’ and you think they’re probably lying to make you feel better?

I’m nobody’s taxi service; I’m not gonna be there to catch you every time you feel like jumping out of a spaceship. You know how I sometimes have really brilliant ideas? You know when grown-ups tell you ‘everything’s going to be fine’ and you think they’re probably lying to make you feel better?

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